When I roll out of the bed and begin the day with "Winter Lady" by Leonard Cohen or "I‘m Not" by Panda Bear, leave my hair in it's natural shape and color, bathe, spend weekends at either Pehrspace... or watching Mel Brooks films, and end the quite day with the even quieter Brightblack Morning Light, it's perhaps blurry to imagine that not too long ago I was once a dirty, acid-wash wearing punk ass kid with homemade blonde hair going to all these grimy as fuck shows. One of my closest friends from high school (a fellow ex-punk) and I decided to go to the Mika Miko record release party/show at The Smell. Nothing against Mika Miko, but I was more interested in seeing one of the 4 opening bands whom I have never heard of. We showed up in the usual attire: button-ups, jeans, chill as hell old man shoes. When we walked into the alley of The Smell, we thought to ourselves, "what the...we look like senior citizens up in the bitch...." The majority of the crowd had strategically cut-and-placed hair that was over their eyes, weighed no more than 90 lbs and were mostly under the age of 17. As my friend treated me the $5 admission fee, we laughed as he said to me, "Ey, it's exactly like high school, huh?" Not once can I recall that I had accepted an invitation to do the time warp, and by no means did I ask to do it again. We walked in and it was much, much hotter, more crammed since it was a sold-out show (cuz apparently, The Smell can sell out...?) and much more pubescent than usual. The first band finished and I had the chance of catching P R O T E C T M E's set. Even though both members look like a couple guys I probably would've known in high school, the difference was that they sounded a hell of a lot better than anyone I would've known in high school (my little one trick pony band included, probably). P R O T E C T M E reminded me that there was still such a thing as electro-punk and that it was still okay to have super catchy ass songs that were no more than 2 minutes long. I usually wouldn't have enjoyed a show like that: a bunch of kids running around screaming for a band that could have been 2 years younger than me. I surprised myself, however, that I thoroughly enjoyed myself. P R O T E C T M E is a Los Angeles based two-piece with member Jordan and Luis. I had not expected such a loud boom to erupt out of the amps and speakers from such small fellows, but they made quite the combustion and the fans made quite the ruckus. Nothing short or enormously energetic, the two-some tore the walls of The Smell down with the mob of angst sort of moshing next to me. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't annoyed a bit at first. As the show progressed, however, my mood did as well. I found myself tapping to the beguiling beats and muffled vocals. It was likeable and had an appealing club to it beyond the heavy bass and drums. According to the grapevine, people are into that kind of thing. I wasn't awaiting some type of out-of-body experience in which I connect with my soul on some mode of a kinetic plateau of extreme consciousness that night (which I didn't) but P R O T E C T M E filled me with a child-like glee as I re-connected my younger days with my current self. Everyone attempts to escape an embarrassing past; but as I mature I find that I have a peaceful life knowing that I'm ok with the douche I once was and the not-as-much of a douche that I am now. Thanks, P R O T E C T M E. They made the crowd smile, dance and go bat shit crazy as they blitzkrieged everyone's asses with their liveliness in a town where drab is chic. Being in the front, I was thrown in the pit a few times, got stepped on, hit and sweated on; and I couldn't have been any more at peace with that night. It felt nice relocating my inner snot-nosed prick. If you feel sad that you didn't see P R O T E C T M E like me, then its all good homes. They're playing about 6 shows at The Smell in the near future. B. Kramer

Tags: Protectme, The Smell

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